I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
