Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize