Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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