Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
