How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
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