Me too!
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
