Are we in a gay sports bar?
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
