I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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