Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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