Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
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