Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
