He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I enjoy the company of your penis
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
