no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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