you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
