Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize