you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
