that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
