If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
And my parents said I crawled through the house
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I'm always down for nudity.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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