He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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