Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Randomize
