Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
