just come out here and I will go home with you...
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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