So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
It's rum buckets o'clock
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