If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
high people should be assigned attendants
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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