how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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