Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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