The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
