So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize