Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Randomize
