Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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