It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
