Well apparently he's into motor boating.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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