Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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