The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
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I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
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In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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