Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
