apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
