ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
