it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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