so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
People Share What It’s Really Like to Date Long Distance
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
These Little Things Make People Overly Angry
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.