I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.