But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
