I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
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It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
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I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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