there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
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