Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
The power of my boobs compel you
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize