I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize