I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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