So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
