No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
My vagina just clenched in fear
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
