and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Randomize