I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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