I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
