I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
high people should be assigned attendants
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
